who am I

If I were to open my mouth youd say I was black
If I were to say nothing youd swear I was white

Mixed up in a lot of ways
My mind set and my life
Always wondering what I am

Confusion
What am i

I am night
I am day

Redbone
Lightskin
White girl
Wannabe bitch
Still that I hear again and again

I am not happy
The skin I’m in
Frustrations
Built upon connotations
Are you white
Are you black
What nationality
What race might you be

Questions I hear daily

While I make decisions
Regarding my children
While I earn my pay
A meager wage

Excuse me
I was trying to figure out
We were talking and….
Looking at you I see
Listening to you I hear
You sound black
But look white

My response differs from day to day
It depends on my mood…
One minute Im strong and steady
The other caught off guard and not ready

What is my move
Or my next plight
Must I keep hearing this


Mixed relations
Formal obligations

Back and forth
Who am i
Conflict with no resolution
I have a problem
That has no solution
Day to day
Back and forth
Who am I

Black persuasion
Skin caucasion
Unanswered questions
Destined to be
Track record of lonliness
Cuz no one really feels me…

Who am I
Fighting inside…
Trying to figure out
Constant deliberations
Who am I

No set race or nationality
A combination of them all
Done gracefully

An umph in my walk
A lil glide in my stride
Who am I
Alone in my room
No one really understands

poet erotica

I’m sitting here thinking of you

Missing you

All the wonderful things I think

When I’m thinking of you

Your voice and your style

Drives me wild

I m thinking of you

Your legs, in mine

Entwined

I’m thinking of you

Your lips, my breast

Soft caress

I’m thinking of you

Your hand, my thigh

The bump and grind

I’m thinking of you

XO Prime Steakhouse

So me and a girlfriend went to eat at XO tonight... Our meal was fabulous and this is a 5 star restaurant... We had Fondue as an appetizer, for entrees she had the Rosemary Chicken with red potatoes (I had a sample and the chicken just melted in my mouth), I had the Twin filet medallions with the steamed spinach...

First, I want to talk about the food... Albeit fabulous but while my potatoes and spinach were nice and hot, my meat was almost frozen... I mean lukewarm at best... So aside from me having to wait for my food the first time... I now have to wait yet again... with no offer of a free wine, drink refill, or even another appetizer while I waited... Upon the return the food was excellent... If I could have felt decent by keeping my tip I would have because of this little oversight (the chefs issue not the wait staff,) but I didnt, I still tipped because the service was flawless... all the way down to setting me down... I mean, I loved the treatment of the service staff it was a total pleasure to speak and deal with them... They kept my water full and insisted upon my satisfaction in regards to my dining pleasure as well as my meal...

Second, I want to talk about the restrooms... I feel like if you are charging $40 minimum for entrees your restrooms should have an attendant, a clean space at the very least... I walk in and there is paper towels on the floor and the toilet paper wasnt even in the roll lol... it was placed on the back of the commode (very awkward I might add) water was splashed all over the vanity and from the looks of it they were using store bought Dial soap... I was very displeased by this to say the least...

Overall, the service staff was excellent. The ambiance of the restaurant was par for the course having an upscale clientele and one of the best mojitos I have had in awhile... I just didnt appreciate the restroom nor the extended wait time... As far as the bathroom... Well if you have a chance to visit this beautiful restaurant at 500 W. St. Clair Ave. Cleveland, Ohio and need to use the bathroom, pay attention to your shoes as you walk out... They may be carrying a piece of the restroom with you...

Shoe Dazzle

Well this month has been just a random encounter of events... Not to say that it wasnt a good month... it was just kind of weird.

I started a membership with Kim Kardashians' ShoeDazzle.com... I have to say I was quite surprised with it all and too excited to get my shoes delivered to me... It all started because I have an unreal shoe fetish... I have several pairs of shoes that I have yet to wear and bought them just because. I know a lot of women have a love for shoes and other accessories, but mine is really a fetish... I have all types of shoes and have even tried to downsize by donating some to charity only to have outgrown my closet yet again...

So anyway... I joined and upon joining you are greeted with a survey of sorts... A survey to discover which designers lines you like more than others... I can see how this would give them a sense of who you are and what you like... but I really believe this survey should be given monthly, because my tastes have been known to change drastically from one period to another...

The next step was to wait 5 days and they (personal professional shoppers/stylist) would select 5 shoe styles for the month for me to choose from... The shoes they sent were, in a word, FABO-LOUS... yes indeed I not only wanted 1 pair... I wanted about 4 out of the 5 (could be attributed to my fetish but who knows) I mean I didnt have a particular outfit in mind for these shoes but I wanted them...

Now, the thing with shoedazzle.com is you pay a monthly fee and get a pair of shoes each month for the fee... I was curious as to whether the workmanship and quality of the shoes would be up to par. (I am a Kim fan, so I kinda started out trusting the service.)

The shoes shown to me were 1 pair of low heeled shoes with crystals (ick!), 2 pairs of boots that were to die for, 1 strappy stiletto sandal (another one to die for) and another pair of heels that were aptly titled "Vixen" with an ankle tri-clasp and a heel as high as the Empire State Building, also a bonus shoe was offered for the Wear Red campaign of the American Heart Association and they were HOTT as well... ::side note: they sold out before I could pick them up:: Im not a big fan of blood red anyways... but I digress... I picked a pair of tan suede boots with a strap of suede cris-crossing its way up the calf of the boot... MAH-VELOUS... really...

When I got these boots in the mail... I lost my breath, literally, they are gorgeous and everything I hoped they be... They fit so well and I got plenty of compliments and people asking "Where did you get them?" my response: Ancient Chinese Secret lol... I was not ready to divulge my sources as of yet... You see, I have a very common shoe size and if I give out my source I was sure to be cat fighting with another lover of shoes... I couldnt bear it right away so I stay tight lipped about it for a while... I cant stand buying shoes at dept stores or Payless (ugh) I have to be unique in my finds... and I promise you this... you will be hard pressed to find someone with the same shoe as me at any given time... I am pretty secretive about where I buy my shoes... I love Boutiques and the low quantity they have for that very reason...

Needless to say I cant wait to see what the March selections will be... I have become a shoedazzle.com member for life...